I know where your coming from with this, i see all these types out at clubs constantly, but i just feel its a bit general, a real traditional man can do many things, i can change a tire dress casual or gq, and ignore feminism while im cooking myself dinner, as far as feeling safe and secure, confidence isnt a style its a virtue. Signed
A Traditionally well-informed man

I have a tendancy to agree with your list. Although there ARE admittedly a few exceptions.
Maybe Jesse could help with ‘a real woman’ list for us. Any man who’s well-informed must be able to help us out with that. I’d be interested to see a man’s point of view.
-Wonder Woman

Wow…The term metrosexual just entered our lexicon in the USA in the past few years, at lest my lexicon at any rate. We do however have the type in ever increasing numbers. We call them the New Castrati though I would be a neanderthal to them.lol

Being a traditional man I can only say whay lights a fire under me.
-She is strong when the kids are sick or I cut myself in the boat shop, but needs holding when she needs it and comes and gets it.
-She is not afraid of letting me take her arm/hand when on a walk in the Mall or side walk, in fact She expects it.
-She spends lots on hair and clothes, because she cares what I alone think.
-She truly loves kids and knows she is better at nurture then I am.
-She is magnificant always, especially with ruffled morning hair…she may not know it either.
-She knows the power of that black dress over her man.
-She likes it that he knows that she has that power as well.
-She is his compass, his foundation that strenghtens him againsts lifes blows.
-She cooks better and knows it.
-She thinks he is better then a pillow to cuddle with at night.
-She could home school her children and they would get early entrance to any University.
-She has my back, always.
-She, when threatened expects me to fight for her.
-She knows I will win.
-She would do the same for me.
-She would understand I need to see whats over the horizon.
-She would be my friend and brave it with me, at my side.
-She would be in the rocking chair next to me when I am 90.

Haha, Great! That’s more or less what I want, actually.

The thought of losing my independence in the kind of relationship that you are describing is kind of scary for two reasons; the prevalence of divorce and the amount of brainwashing that independence is the most important thing for a woman.

I think that with the right calibre of man, I could overcome those feelings though. Right now I have all the independence I could possibly want but am not fulfilled.

For the female readers, what do you think of Will’s entry? Would that work for you?

Cordelia,

The preceding comments covered most of the bases, but I do have something to add. I am an old fashioned man; is there any other kind? Let me give you my take on relationships & marriage.

I’ve never been married, but I’ve seen good marriages in action. Granted, they’re a mere handful compared to all the bad ones out there, but I have seen enough of them to know that they exist.

One, I think that men & women sow the seeds of their eventual divorces early on. They focus too much on romance & sex; if that elusive ‘chemistry’ isn’t there, then the person isn’t boy/girlfriend material. While these couples may have PHYSICAL intimacy, they don’t have GENUINE intimacy, i.e. a bona fide mental, emotional, and spiritual connection with the other person. The ‘chemistry’ everyone talks about is just a chemical reation in your brain; since it’s a feeling, it changes. The couple never figure out whether or not they have anything in COMMON. What do I mean by this?

I’m talking about core beliefs; I’m talking about what I call ‘make or break’ issues. For example (and this is a major cause of divorce), what is the man’s & woman’s attitude towards money? What are each person’s beliefs about child rearing? Do they both even WANT children? These are the kinds of things that are ‘make or break’ issues, issues that can sink a relationship. So, it is safe to say that the modern approach to relationships DOES NOT WORK! If it did, then the results would show it; there would be fewer divorces.

How should a man and woman relate to one another? I prefer being friends with the woman first; I want to know who she IS, what she’s about, etc. Being friends allows me to get a good look at her mind, her heart, and her values WITHOUT sex blurring the picture.

Two, as for marriage, I think that the husband should be the boss; he should be the head of the house. Why? Because we’re the more logical of the two, i.e. men & women. We men don’t think with our emotions as women do; we can set our emotions aside, and deal with a situation dispassionately, i.e. without our emotions getting in the way.

This was a particularly useful trait when we men had to actually go out and HUNT for our next meal, so we could feed ourselves & our families. Unfortunately, the animal we wanted for our next meal was also being targeted by other predators, animals who, like us, were seeking THEIR next meal too! For example, I might see a deer that’d provide LOTS of venison-yummy! However, a hungry mountain lion may want that deer for HIS dinner too, so we’d end up having to fight for the meal. When you have to not only try to bag your meal, but also fight off other hungry predators, emotions can only make things worse; a woman would freak out, whereas a man will face the situation, and deal with it. Will he be scared? Yes, but he can set that fear aside to deal with the situation at hand.

Is this to say that women are incapable of logical thought? Is this to say that men have no emotions? Is this to say that men cannot express emotions? The answer is no on all counts. What I mean is this: for men, their DEFAULT mode of operation is logical, i.e. they invoke logic first for the situations they face. Women’s default thought process is emotional, and it’s her emotions that’ll influence how she deals with things in her life. Sorry I got off track…

Anyway, I said that the man should be in charge. I see the family as being analogous to a little ship. The husband is the captain; the wife is his first mate; the children are the crew. A wise captain will not let his ego get in the way; if his wife has a better idea, he’ll use it rather than his own. It’s all about the team; it’s all about the “SHIP’S” success, not the captain’s ego. However, there will be times when the captain (husband) and his first mate (wife) don’t agree. When there is a dispute within the family, someone has to be the final arbiter; the buck has to stop somewhere. In this case, it stops with the husband.

For you, would this mean not being able to use your skills, talents, and abilities? No, I don’t think so. There are women who studied business at university. They worked, but after marriage & children, they remained home; the husband earned the money. These women, because they were managing the home, its limited expenditures, and resources, found their business backgrounds to be quite useful.

There is a man on shortwave I listen to; his name is Alex Jones. He talks about the New World Order and stuff like that. His marriage is traditional. His wife happens to have an IT background. What does she do? She does all the webpages he needs for his radio programs, films, etc. In other words, you could have a traditional marriage, stay home with the children, and still use your IT background. Perhaps your future husband has his own business, and your help with his website would be most invaluable to him.

Three (and this is my final point!), don’t worry about FINDING the right person; worry about BEING the right person! What do I mean by this? Don’t worry about finding an old fashioned man; worry about being an old fashioned woman. If you take care of that, an old fashioned man will see you and appreciate what you have to offer him. Besides, we cannot control who we will meet, where we will meet them, etc. However, we can always work on being better people; self-improvement is something we can work on any time, anywhere. Does this make sense? You want a real man? Then be a real LADY…

I have to go to bed now; I’ve stayed up way too late! I did it because you seem like a good, decent person who’s seeking the truth. Having been in your shoes, I appreciated guidance I received from others; the least I can do is help someone who is where I used to be. Work on being the best LADY you can be; the rest is in God’s hands. I will say this: if you were over here, I would have you for myself! Though you’re not perfect (no one is, especially me), you’re a hell of a catch. I know a good thing when I see it, and Cordelia, you ARE a good thing, a good woman if I ever saw one. Have a good night…

MarkyMark

The metro man sounds like a teenage boy. ROFL.

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