…and Political Correctness

Political Correctness is today what church censorship in Europe was five hundred years ago. I suppose you could also say that political correctness is something of a new religion for many people. It certainly has many devoted followers!

An example is if somebody famous makes a public statement that deviates too far from the politically correct norm. He or she can then basically kiss their career and reputation good-bye! (I cannot speak from an American perspective, but this is certainly true in Europe today.)

In some cases (for example if the offender was drunk) a very profound apology might do, along with a donation to a suitable charity. The offending individual must from then on pledge complete allegiance to the ten commandments of political correctness, which are:

1. I AM the almighty mainstream MEDIA, who reaches everyone, everywhere, 24/7… You shall worship me regularly and always agree with my take on current events and world politics. (Never mind that I change my mind about things on a regular basis!)
2. Thou shalt not draw thy own conclusions or hold any opinions that are not sanctioned by ME, the mainstream MEDIA. Only backwards, weak and mentally unstable people seek the truth in traditional values, in the Bible or through their own observations and logical reasoning.

   I, THE MEDIA alone hold the truth and I am an unforgiving God…

3. Thou shalt not make wrongful mentioning of words such as ‘immigration’, ‘feminism’ ‘secular society’, ‘abortion’, ‘refugee’, ‘modern lifestyle’ or anything related foreign cultures or religions. I, PC MEDIA will come down very harshly of those that misuse these expressions!
4. Remember the WEEKEND when you must shop for new clothes and gadgets that you don’t really need, play some violent computer games and go out partying and drinking ‘til dawn.
   
   Footnote: Casual sex during the weekend is optional but strongly recommend. Do use a condom, but if you should happen to forget; Remember that there is nothing wrong with catching an STD or having an abortion.
5. Honour thy father and thy mother by making sure that they are signed up for a great retirement home ideally at a good distance from where you live, so that your days in the office may be long and un-disturbed.
6. Likewise your children: Under no circumstances must you let their existance have an impact on your Career, particularly not if you are a modern woman.
7. Thou shalt not commit murder. (But if you do, make sure you do it in Europe where you are likely to serve less than 6 years in most countries. While in prison, thou shalt recieve therapy, further education and regular access to MY TRUTH via the television…)
8. With regards to adultery; The only thing that really counts as adultery is seeing a prostitute. Prostitution is exploitation and objectification of women and therefore politically incorrect. You can however work long late nights with your sexy secretary or handsome co-worker. What others (i.e spouse) don’t know about won’t hurt them, so therefore do not worry about the nature or particulars of this relationship…
   Casual sex between singles is strongly encouraged; again, use a condom, for that is the will of the National Service for Sexual Health.
9. If thou art a woman, I MEDIA command thee to always dress according to either of the following guidelines; a) generally sexy and revealing, or b) jeans and very tight top a la Kate Moss… Study MY TRUTH about this important matter in the fashion magazines. Make sure that you are a devoted disciple and regularly worship at the altar of Versace, Prada and Jimmy Choo.

   Footnote; Women, under no circumstances must you consider being a housewife. These are oppressed and unproductive. It is much better that you work full time and use the services of a creche for child-care and a housekeeper for housework. The more you can be like a man, the better woman you are…

10. You shalt constantly envy your neighbour his sexy wife, his hot car, his luxury holidays his 50” plasma TV and any other possessions that he may have, that you feel you ought to also have.
    
    Do whatever it takes to make sure that you keep up with his lifestyle. If possible, choose an environmentally friendly alternative and don’t forget to tell all your friends that you did.
11. And a bonus commandment! When jetting off to a cool and PC ‘eco-friendly holiday’ in the ‘last un-touched’ area on earth, make sure that you are not wearing sneakers that were produced in a factory using child labour… And while on the jumbo-jet, do remember to only order organically produced wine and champaigne…

Can you see all the contradictions? The bar for what is politically correct is constantly moving. And the opinion of a large part of the public is obediently changing with it… In my opinion you’d be best served by finding a standard that does not change with mood of contemporary society… I can think of one, but that is not what this article is about…

Reflect on society as it is today, in all its ludicrous double-standards… Compare that reality with how you think it should be, and ‘mind the gap!’ Don’t swallow the politically correct message in media just because it sounds good when you first hear it, and just because ‘everybody else’ believe in it! There are plenty of good examples in history of situations when the masses were mislead.

Whatever opinion you may end up claiming as your own, make sure you do so because you have actually thought about it, not just because you listen uncritically to the BBC, CNN, Fox News or any similar media channel…
It drives me crazy that only certain opinions are allowed, and that some subjects are too taboo to even mention, despite being on everybody’s mind.

I am not saying any of these things because I actually hold any seriously politically in-correct opinions. I just dislike the climate whereby everybody repeats each other’s opinions like parrots, and jump on anybody who contradicts, like a pack of hyenas….!
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I was so flattered and happy when I learnt that somebody has written an article about me on the very popular blog “Oz Conservative.”
What’s more, he had understood everything I said just right, and he turned my slightly rambling posts into something that sounds quite academic, really.

It was really amazing to read about myself in third person like that. Particularly in connection with a subject that I have never discussed with anybody outside of the internet. It was also rather cool to be called a feminine rebel!

This experience alone has made me very pleased that I took up blogging.

The article can be found here: “Feminine Rebellions”
Enjoy!

I was investigating Swedish blog directories and visited “Tjejsajten” [translation: The Girls’ Site]. I was thinking about possibly adding my own site to their blog directory. But I first wanted to get a feel for the blogs listed there.
Scene of the ‘crime’… Nice site though…
It was quite a mix, but it is safe to say that Shopping and Relationships were by far the most popular topics! I haven’t added my site yet. I am not sure it fits in, and besides, the site is 100% Swedish language only. For the time being I am blogging in English.
May or may not
be the same girl
Well, in order to check the site out, I clicked on some completely random links. One of the links surprisingly took me to the pages of a rather junior member of the site; a 14 year-old girl who lives in one of the largest towns in Southern Sweden.

I got so touched and upset when I noticed the following entry on her blog: (translated from Swedish)

…If I HAVE to lose my virginity, I would at least want it to be to somebody who has some feelings for me, not just somebody who is horny…

Isn’t that awful?! Why does she feel that she should “have to” lose her virginity at all?

In my ‘expert’ opinion, most teenage boys cannot differentiate between sexual feelings and actual love! (I think some men stay that way all life by the way.)

Her odds of finding somebody who ‘has some feelings” for her should therefore be pretty good… But I would guess that the second part of her sentence will play in too, equally strongly…!

Why, oh why do we live in a society where a nice, sweet, intelligent girl feels that there is something wrong with her being a virgin at 14?

• What if she gets pregnant? Then she’ll be in an awful dilemma, having to choose between being a single teenage mother and having an abortion.
• What if she gets some horrid disease? Then she’ll start off her sex-life in the most off-putting and depressing way!
• What about when he dumps her for the prettier/cooler/more experienced girl next door? How much more awful won’t she feel about it?
• Or perhaps it is she that discovers that he wasn’t really the guy for her after all. She’ll feel a right idiot then, having lost her virginity to someone she doesn’t even fancy!
• And what about the fact that it actually hurts quite badly to loose your virginity? The very best man to share that experience with is your husband!

  (I suppose there are some more or less socially and politically correct alternatives, such as a man who you are in a ‘committed relationship’ with.) But really, it is an important event, a milestone for any woman. This young girl seems to be about to take the step without realising she is actually giving away a precious part of herself forever.

(Personally I gave away that part of myself at 19, to an (admittedly) very handsome Israeli soldier whose name I have forgotten. It hurt like crazy and I regretted my ‘decision’ to ‘get rid of’ my virginity before the act was even completed. I managed to ‘hold out’ for the duration though…I still remember how I had to force myself not to cry out. Oh horror!

I couldn’t blame it on the guy though. He had no idea I was a virgin and I never let on…The blood didn’t come until the next day. Bear in mind though though, that I had grown up thinking that virginity was outdated and undesirable. I was convinced it was necessary to loose my virginity before I turned 20…)

The girl’s blog entry was posted in February and she has not updated her blog since…. I wonder what happened? Perhaps it is already too late, but I wrote this message to her: (translated from Swedish)

Sweetie, please don’t go losing your virginity just because you are under the impression that it is uncool to remain a virgin.

It really is quite the opposite; it is cool to value yourself enough not to let anybody get that intimate with you until he has TOTALLY convinced you that he is worthy. Honey, you are both clever and pretty!

Teenage guys really mainly want one things from girls… Why should a great girl like you waste that on some idiot who is likely to dump you for another conquest a few months from now? Or why waste it on somebody whom you may very well find useless a few months from now?

Please try to hang in there with the virginity until you are at least 20. At that age you can make a more adult and mature evaluation of the situation. Trust me, EVERYBODY I know wish they had waited until then.

Also, think about how pleased and proud you will be that you waited, when you meet that great man who may even be your future husband… He is guaranteed to be impressed and will end up with much stronger feelings for you because of it.

I have experienced what she is experiencing. The attitudes were more or less the same then (approx. 1990) as they are now. All that’s changed since then is the arrival of the internet and reality TV…

Anyway, I think such attitudes are wrong! This girl is not a slut, she is a ‘victim’ of sorts, of a very skewed culture.

What do you think?

Technorati Tags: conservative,
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This entry is a day-dream. It is written to sound like it’s going on right now, but really, it’s just fantasy. A real day in my life is more like this.

I live in the countryside, far away from the stress and crowds of the big cities. My husband and I have a lovely house that is spacious and comfortable but not ostentatious. I have decorated it to make it cosy, inviting and stylish.

The house has several ecological features and is environmentally sound. It is well-insulated and has some solar panels on the roof. Our garden contains vegetables that are appropriate for the climate. There are fruit trees various bushes with berries. I harvest it all and save it for cooking.

Oh, I haven’t talked much about my (dream) husband yet. He is a great man. I love him to bits and admire him a lot. I trust him completely and he is so clever. He is taller than my 5’10” and has a great smile when he is happy. His looks are neither here nor there. I love him for who he is.

He is a man who has tons of integrity. He has work ethics and personal ethics. He does what he says he is going to do.

Since getting to know him I have lost my old attraction to doing ‘naughty’ things. I used to like having a spliff at parties, having a cigarette when I felt stressed, or shoplifting cheap stuff to avoid queuing to pay. But I want my husband to be proud of having me as a wife, so no more of any of that stuff!

When he touches me he makes me feel in a way that no man ever has. I didn’t use to care much for sex before him. It wasn’t difficult to keep to adhere to my (relatively) high moral standards with regards to sex as I simply wasn’t even tempted very often. But since I met my husband I have got quite into sex and often can’t wait for him to get home when he is away!
Is this the house? I loved the picture…
I know what type of clothes he finds attractive and sexy and I often choose those types of clothes on purpose. He is my husband and I can be as seductive as I want with him since it’s legit in the eyes of God…

My husband has plenty of interests that I don’t share. It’s mainly blokey stuff that I don’t mind him doing, but that I don’t want to participate in myself.

That’s great; it gives me time to do things outside of the relationship, which I like. I was never one of those ‘glued-to-my-man’ kind of woman. When he is off doing these things, I spend time with my female friends, look after myself or organise my house and work on some cool and somewhat profitable Web2 projects. I am able to make a bit of money on an online business. I have also become something of a Domestic Goddess and I find that very fulfilling.
Riding the bicycle on rural roads
We have really interesting neighbours in our area. Some are countryside people who have lived there all their lives. Others are old city-dwellers, who have come here seeking a different lifestyle.

Since moving here I have got to know some great people; I am now in a sewing circle, and sometimes help out with community matters. I also baby-sit and am part of a nice church. Finally I have time and energy for female friendship, and there are some really nice women around. A few times I have taught IT in the local school. It’s great to finally be part of a community.

My husband supports our family (currently only him and me, but guess what – I just found out that I am pregnant! Can’t wait to tell my husband, but how do I tell him and make it really special? )

I support him back in every way that I can, making sure that he has a nice home to relax in and that he gets healthy and tasty food to eat. Whenever he needs me I am there. When he doesn’t need me… I do something else! I listen to him and try to be as supportive as I can when he talks about his work. I am so proud of him, he is doing really well and I lack for nothing. I know he’ll make a very good father when the day comes.

We live near the water, something that means a lot to me. My husband is thinking of buying a boat and I can’t wait for it to happen so we can go boating. I don’t mind whether it will be a motor boat or a sailing yacht, either is great.
Down by the lake….
Our house is surrounded by trees and wildlife. There are some great trails around and I often go hiking, running or looking for berries and mushrooms.

I keep my bicycle for riding to the shops, but sometimes I drive; I have finally managed to get a driving licence thanks to the patience and support of my husband. Not a day too early. I can’t believe it took me so long to learn to drive; now it seems so easy! Our car is environmentally friendly.

Oh, I’ve got to go – my husband is on his way in with some wood that he’s been out chopping. We’ll lit a fire in the fireplace tonight – can’t wait to cuddle up in front of the fire and hear about what he’s been up to today. The sun is sinking below the horizon and another blessed day is coming to an end. What a charmed life I lead!

Technorati Tags: conservative,
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As a modern career woman in a male-oriented field of work, I must ask myself: "Am I a really a real woman"? What in particular makes a me a woman, other than my female body?
Only way of telling? By Carl Larsson 1898
I rarely cook, I am taller than most men and  I can put on a fairly tough exterior when it is needed. I have a leadership position at work and right now I have few female friends living nearby.

Lately I have become insecure about my femininity! It is hidden very deep inside of me right now. Sure, it shows on the outside - but sometimes I don’t even feel feminine any more. (Maybe I am becoming a female metrosexual.. ugh!)

And why has this happened?
It happens because I essentially live the life of a man!!!

I have neither husband nor children. A woman from a hundred years ago would think I was a complete freak!
Millions of modern women are in the same situation as me. And I am not so sure that all (or even most) of us actually want it!

I can do most things that a man can do; I am independent, competent and earn a high salary. All this might make me think: What do I need a man for?
Would she want to swap with me?
Yet; What do I crave more than anything? To be a real, old-fashioned woman. To have a man who cares for me and to have a home to manage (as opposed to managing stupid IT projects.)

I’d love to be in the kitchen, wearing an apron, preparing healthy and tasty food. I love to keep house and I love sewing. In fact, I enjoy it much more than my job in IT.

I love looking after children and I love to support and help the men that I know and care about. Whereas I rejoice in the career successes of some of my male friends and relations, I get very little satisfaction from my ‘high-powered’ job. Why is this?

I think it is because what I am doing is against nature!

Everything I wanted to prove to myself and others about my competence or career, I have already proven. And to be honest, I wasn’t that fussed to start with. I just needed the money and happened to like IT.
Carl Larsson’s wife & friends sewing.
Pls can I swap? U can have my Blackberry!
But now I need to prove that I can be a real woman! I don’t even know where to start! I spent most of my life trying to emulate men and male behaviour!

I am sick of being so independent, of often being cleverer than men who fancy me (which is a turn-off). I am sick of wearing the trousers, metaphorically and in practice.

I want to be the help-meet, not the leader. I want to be a keeper at home, not a bread-winner. I want to behave in a feminine way, not try to fake a male psyche and physique.

Is femininity dying? Will we end up a unisex race? Will womanhood turn into a pale copy of masculinity instead of remaining something special and unique?

When women try to compete with men they often end up being:

• Runners-up, not winners
• Unhappy and unfulfilled, rather than content and happy
• Poor copies of a male ideal rather than great in being what they were meant to be.
• Exhausted, angry and bitter.

Business class, smart hotel, whatever…
I’d prefer digging in the garden (if I had one)
Before any feminists reading this jump to their guns, please remember that I am a very successful professional woman living in the largest modern city in Europe. I have every right to hold this opinion, and it is based on personal experience of what I am rejecting. I am also not saying that any woman who really wants to be a career woman shouldn’t go for it… Just saying that many women find professional careers unfulfilling.

(I am not some pastor’s wife in the countryside, trying to defend my lifestyle and choices (not that there is anything whatsoever wrong with being a pastor’s wife in the countryside!))

I’d also like to mention that I am convinced that there are women who are better suited for a professional career than for marriage and motherhood. I have no issue with them whatsoever and I wish them all the best.
Important & relevant decisions
I believe that these women are in minority though, and that the rest of us are unfairly assumed to be made from the same stuff as these ’super women.’ In reality most of us are first and foremost women, with the career-identity as runner-up at best.

For thousands of years, a woman who was a great wife, household manager and mother was deemed a success. Today such a woman is written off as ‘just a housewife’ at best, or lazy and stupid at worst!

While I am dissatisfied with my career, my male collegues at the same level seem pleased to be where they are. I find that interesting.

My point is this: For an average woman, professional success does NOT yield happiness or contentedness. Marriage and motherhood usually does though, for a majority of women who try it. Many marriages fail because the woman is spending 50-75% of her energy outside of the relationship. Yes - I know that the situation is different with men. But they aren’t changing much to accomodate. Trying to get them to do so by means of nagging is a good way to alienate them in a marriage.

I am sick of emulating male behaviour. I never want to wear a trouser-suit again (I switched to skirt-suits) and flying business class with a laptop on my knees just feels meaningless. The liberation of women is, to a large extent, a hoax.

Before you say that a woman should be able to have both career and a successful marriage and household; just think about it. What you get from a "having both" scenario is mainly an awful lot of stress!
Plenty of money, no time at all…
Keep on smiling….
Instead of doing one thing well, you end up doing two things half-heartedly. You are not going to be able to spend the time on your marriage and your home that they both need in order to stay in a really good shape. Neither are you going to be able to give anywhere near 100% at work, meaning that your career will never be quite what it could have been!

I won’t even mention how badly your looks will suffer from being constantly sleep-deprived, stressed and short of time for even the most basic body/beauty care. Even if you don’t care about that yourself, don’t forget that guys do! I actually stopped having manicures a year ago because I felt it took up too much of my time. Right now my nails are plain Jane and break very easily…

And what about intimacy in your marriage? You’d be too exhausted six evenings out of seven to enjoy anything other than ‘laying back and thinking of England’, if even that. Based on some limited personal experience, I’m guessing this must be a real problem for a lot of people.

And what is the average guy likely to do when repeatedly turned down for sex? Answer; Hurt, frustrated and confused (but probably unlikely to want to ‘talk about it’), he might for exampe log on to some sites that we’d really rather he didn’t visit!

What else might happen depends of the personalities and personal morality of the people involved, I guess. But at this point it is possible that a vicious circle has appeared in the marriage. A vicious circle leading onto a slippery slope…
Tired and headache…Leave me alone..Thinking:
I do everything around here..and earn the same!
So how exactly is this new predicament "liberation" for women?

Being female today offers the "liberation" of  allowing us to get stressed to pieces from trying to be successful, happily married, keep a magazine-like home and looking like a moviestar, all at the same time…

But what normally seems to happen is that marriages and possibly even motherhood fail for us. More than half of all marriages I believe. And marriage and motherhood simply must rate higher than career on the cosmic scale of importance, right? At least it seems to me that it should do…!
“Must clean the bathroom.. iron our
work-clothes.. weekly shopping…”
We are "liberated" to work professionally, but without being able to compete with the men on equal terms - at least if you are married or in a serious relationship. I won’t get started on the ‘glass-ceiling’. But as somebody quite close to it, I am certain that it is there.

I also know that  very few women are able to break the glass ceiling despite being extremely competent and good at what they do. Looking at those women who do break through it… Well, all I can say is that it really doesn’t seem worth it to me… Personally I don’t think I’ve got what it takes. But even if I did, it doesn’t seem worth it. The women who succeed are actually usually not very nice - probably due to having had to become a bitch to make it… I know what drove them to do it, and their achievement is impressive.. But I have yet to meet one such woman that I actually like.

A large number of women (including me) are seriously under the weather for 4-8 days a month. Competing with the guys during these days is particularly hard. During these days, my being a woman is constantly on my mind in a way that it normally isn’t. The problem can be solved for most women with an un-holy concoction of painkillers, hormone pills and a few other drugs. But all it actually needs is a slow day at home!
Lynette in Desperate Housewives. Looking
worn due to her unreasonable schedule.
Another problem is that the more time I spend emulating male behaviour at work, the less feminine (and more masculine) I become. I have learnt military leadership techniques for goodness sake! I can push my guys as if I was a drill sergeant… And every time I do, it kills of another bit of my female soul.…

All my feminine qualities are undesirable at work. Being caring, giggly, pretty, emotional etc, etc are all negative things to a greater or lesser extent. In my reviews at work I have had negative feedback involving all of these qualities, believe it or not.
Technorati Tags: women”,woman,housewife,womanhood, conservative, traditional

All my life I have preferred the way things were done in the past to the way they are done now.

It seems to me that more care, pride, quality, time and love went into how things were done in the past. Here are some examples of what I mean:

In every single example I prefer the old fashioned way. What about you?

After all, since society is the way that it is today, it must mean that most people think it’s better this way, right? So why am I different? Am I some freak of nature that strives backwards in evolution, not forward? Sometimes it feels that way.
Fred Astaire’s I’m Old Fashioned
I am not saying that I would necessarily want to live at the turn of last century, in the thirties or in the fifties… I am aware there were plenty of illnesses then, and that poor people had it very badly. But there are so many things from back then that seem so much better to me.

Can you relate to that at all, or do you feel the same way?

Why Old Fashioned?

I have been thinking about what could make somebody feel dissatisfied and unimpressed with modern society in all it’s high-tech, politically correct, postmodernist, metrosexual glory…

Is it because I was the oldest child? Apparently they tend to be more traditional.

Or is it because I spent so much time with my grandparents, born in 1912 and 1919?

Perhaps I read too many books from times past? Or is it simply something genetical?

My ideal would be today’s technically advanced society with a real drive towards environmental sustainability. Less focus on material possessions, more focus on traditional values. More on my vision for Utopia in a later post!
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